SEVEN SUREWAY TO REPULSE YOUR LOVER

1. During sex repeat overt demands such as, "Look at it, look at it, you know you want to, just do it, just a little bit, come on, you know you want to."

2. During a serious conversation repeatedly ask moronic questions such as, "What baby?" or "What dishes?" or "You don't love my son like you do the others, do you?"

3. When your lover wakes up around 3 am slurp, crunch, suck and lick food items such as hot dogs, pineapple and cheese. Be sure to not stop eating until your lover has fallen back asleep. Add in a vociferous burp and fart.

4. After eating all night long, wake up and complain that your stomach doesn't feel right.

5. When offered alcohol, drink as much as you can, as fast as you can.

6. While your lover peacefully sleeps, consistently grab and pinch her boobs until she wakes up with horror and says, "What the hell were you doing?".

7. Scratch your balls incessantly throughout the night and then offfer the baby your finger when he cries.